First, let me say that in my last post, my plea for you to praise a woman was not meant for you to praise me. I know I am awesome. hahah. I just meant any woman. or anybody, for that matter. Compliments are easy and cheap to give.
I must thank Middle-Aged Mormon Man for the idea for this post. It's not really what he meant, but this is where my mind went. Journals.
Journals. Bah. Another thing to feel guilty about, I have felt, from time to time. Other times, I think, I am so awesome because I am writing in my journal! I have had cycles of regular writing in my life. One of the longest was in college. It has been cool when I've gone back to read those journals--I see very clearly how the Lord keeps His promises. And how often I saw His hand in my life. There are sporadic entries over the last 5-6 years, some detailing how unpleasant parenting can be, some lamenting the passage of time. There are big chunks of time missing, big events missing. I realized today what my biggest block is.
I feel deeply. I am uncomfortable with the depth of my feelings. I am also unable to adequately write about some of these things with the depth of feeling they seem to deserve. It is easier to complain and make lists and make excuses than try to properly record important events and epiphanies. It is easier to be silly and sarcastic. Also, you may have noticed that I am verbose. I don't know how to say things concisely. Isn't it more fun to read details? Not as much detail as Dickens, though. THAT is a lot of detail.
I am in activity girls. This week we are making journals/pseudo smash books. Journaling has changed so much in the last 10 years. We can blog, we can art journal, we can photo journal, we can 365 (a picture a day), we can smashbook ( journal/old school glue-in scrapbooking), etc. As fun as all of this is, it really is no substitute for recording in private the spiritual experiences and personal revelation we receive. Elder Scott is right about this. I just have to do it. It was easier when we wrote in journals together as a family on Sundays. Now my kids keep their journals in their rooms and write when they feel like it and won't be compelled to write when I say to. I pick my battles.
So I have a new goal for spring: write. in. my. journal. I am not going to try to catch up, I will just start from now. And if I want to throw in a few stick figures, I will. :) Do you have things you are starting over this spring?